I had an episode today.

I had an episode today. A few things went wrong and suddenly i was in a maniac depressive state.

Mid sob, i stood up, walked out of my room and boiled a pot of tea. I literally supressed it. Condensed the feeling to the point where i felt numb.

And like holding back on a puke, i feel sick to the pits, i dont feel emotional. Just physically sick. I gag like i want to vomit but theres nothing that wants to come out. Like my stomach is trying to expel something that wasnt even there in the first place.